Who Am I?
by Jily.Love
Summary: Sequel to my story Falling For You! Julianna has just turned fifteen. She's happy living in LA with her parents Darren and Lauren, and her sister Tara. But are her parents keeping a secret from her? Someone from her mom's past is back, and he may change her life forever.
1. Birthday Celebration

**Yayy! Sequel time! I give ALLLLL the credit to Beffax3 to this story. She's the one who came to me with the idea. This wouldn't exist without her, so give her a BIG thank-you!**

_**If you haven't read my story Falling For You yet, make sure to read it before you start this one, or it won't make any sense.**_

**The main relationship in this is CrissPez, but there is some Jaime/Dylan too! I'll try to fit various StarKids in it as the plot progresses! However, keep in mind that a lot of the action will be focused on Julianna.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

Julianna Criss tucked a lock of dark brown hair behind her ear and squinted at her reflection in the mirror. She smiled in approval at her outfit, a purple long sleeve shirt paired with a sparkly scarf and jeans that fit her perfectly.

"Julianna!" Her mom's voice sounded from the bottom of the stairs. "C'mon, sweetie, or you're going to be late for school."

"I'm coming!" Julianna called back, taking a last glance in the mirror before grabbing her backpack and dashing downstairs.

"Happy birthday, Juls!" her dad cried, scooping her into a bear hug. He stepped back. "Just turned fifteen and you already look nineteen." He shook his head in mock astonishment.

"He's right, you know," came Lauren's voice from behind her. "You're growing up too fast." She ruffled her daughter's hair before crossing the room to give Darren a quick hug and kiss.

Julianna smiled, as she always did when she saw her parents happy together.

Darren Criss seemed to have barely aged at all in the past fifteen years. He still had curly dark hair that had become a family joke (_"Kids, when your father and I were in college, he had the biggest afro I've ever seen," Lauren would tell them jokingly._) He still cracked jokes that made Lauren scold him, and he would constantly play the guitar.

Lauren still seemed young too, although not as youthful as she once was. Her brown hair was beginning to grow in gray and her face had more lines. Still, she had a young soul. Julianna had always felt like her mom was one of her closest friends. Of course, she was annoying about mom things, like eating healthy and getting enough exercise, doing well in school, and hanging out with the right crowd, but that was to be expected.

"Are you ready, birthday girl?" Lauren asked Julianna. She turned towards the kitchen. "Tara! Are your shoes on?"

Julianna glanced back just in time to see her younger sister barreling towards them and couldn't hold back a giggle. "Happy birthday!" Tara cried.

Julianna hugged her sister. "Thanks, princess." The two girls were incredibly close, despite being four years apart in age. They had grown even closer since Tara was diagnosed with anorexia when she was ten.

"Did you eat?" Lauren asked her youngest daughter seriously. When Tara nodded, Lauren pulled her into a hug. "C'mon ladies, let's get a move on!"  
And so the girls hugged Darren one last time before running out to the car.

* * *

Julianna got home that afternoon with a smile on her face. She walked into the kitchen, where Lauren was frosting a batch of cupcakes. Gluten-free, not that it made a difference. Her mom was the best baker in the world.

"Hi sweetie! How was school?" Lauren asked, handing a spoon of frosting to her daughter.

"Fine," Julianna said through a mouthful of frosting. "Mmm, this is good."

Lauren smiled proudly. "You think so?"

"Of course, Mom."

"That's good to hear," Lauren said, "because some people are coming over tonight to celebrate."

"Oooh, who?" Julianna asked excitedly.

"Oh, you know. The usual. Dylan and Jaime and their kids. Joey and his family. And Devin with her husband."

Julianna smiled; Her parent's friends from college were some of her favorite people in the world. She hugged Lauren and ran upstairs to do her homework.

* * *

That night, everyone clustered around the living room TV, watching AVPM.

The kids were sitting on the floor, shrieking with laughter as their respective parents appeared onscreen. The adults were having a great time as well, enjoying watching the video that launched their careers. "See, I TOLD you he had an afro!" Lauren told her kids, taking a sip of champagne.

Devin and Jaime had buried their faces in the sofa cushions, overcome with giggles. "Oh, Jesus.. Joey Richter, I will never, ever, EVER get over you and Darren wearing those dress robes. EVER." Devin cackled.

Darren walked into the room carrying a tray of drinks. "Are they laughing about our costumes again?"

"Yes. Yes they are." Dylan poked Jaime in the ribs, making her laugh even harder.

Darren distributed champagne flutes (filled with Sprite, of course) to the kids. "To Julianna," he toasted. "May this year be just as wonderful for you as the past fifteen have been for us. We love you more than words can say, Princess." He raised his own glass. "To Julianna!" he repeated, and the room echoed it.

Lauren stood next. "I remember when we brought you home from the hospital," she said, eyes misting over with tears. "Little did we know what an adventure we were about to embark on. I hope you had a wonderful day. I love you sweetheart."

"Aw, mom," Julianna stood to peck Lauren on the cheek. "Thank you so much." She turned to face the whole group. "And thank you all so much for coming."

Joey jumped to his feet. "Sit down, girl. You're crazy if you think I'm not gonna make a toast on your fifteenth birthday," he reprimanded jokingly.  
Julianna laughed as she perched on the arm of the couch.

"Julianna, what do I say to you?" Joey asked. "Fifteen years old already. Man, I feel old."

"We know you're old," Darren rolled his eyes at his best friend. "Get on with it already!"

Joey gave Darren a dirty look before continuing. "Anyway, it feels like just yesterday you were running around my house and knocking things over while your parents were on their honeymoon." He cleared his throat. "You've always been like an honorary daughter to me, Juls. Ever since-"

Darren choked on his champagne, his eyes bugging out of his head. Simultaneously, Lauren's face drained of color as she frantically shook her head at Joey.

"-Since you were born," Joey saved. Darren and Lauren traded similar looks of relief, grateful that the secret they had kept from Julianna for fifteen years was still intact. "Happy birthday. We love ya." Joey concluded. "To Julianna!"

And so the party continued. Cake was devoured, presents were opened, and laughter echoed around the house.

But all good things must come to an end, and Julianna began saying her goodbyes to the guests.

"Bye, Cho!" Darren shouted across the hall. "Bye, Ginny! Bye, Ron! Bye, Albus!"

"Detention for you, Potter!" Dylan shouted back. "Just kidding. You called me Albus. I have to expel you!"

"Don't listen to your crazy dad," Jaime stage whispered to Julianna. "Hey, shoot me a text sometime this week and we'll go shopping. You need to get out of this house before his craziness starts rubbing off on you." She hugged Julianna. "Happy birthday!" She called back as she and Dylan began walking out the door.

* * *

"..Can't believe he almost let it slip," Darren spoke in a hushed voice that night. "I mean, Joey's one of my best friends. But sometimes he doesn't think about what he's saying, you know?"

"It's fine," Lauren replied, resting her head on his shoulder. "She doesn't know. We're all clear."

"Are we ever gonna tell her?" Darren asked.

"We have to," Lauren said resignedly. "She has the legal right to meet him when she turns eighteen. That's only three years from now."

"Why can't we tell her now?" Darren persisted. "Give her time to get used to the idea."

"Do you know what that does to a child's self-esteem?" Lauren asked. "To know that you weren't supposed to be on Earth? That you were born because a horrible thing happened to your mother?"

"You're right," Darren admitted. "But it has to happen sometime."

"Just not right now." Lauren snuggled into the bed. "We have three years to figure it out."

* * *

Down the hall, Julianna was pouring herself a glass of water. She could hear the sound of their voices from their bedroom. She couldn't make out the words, only Darren's deep voice and Lauren's higher one. She yawned, put her glass down, and slipped back down the hallway into her room.  
Outside, a shooting star sped across the sky. Julianna closed her eyes. _I wish every birthday I have will as wonderful as this one was._

* * *

**Oooooh! Semi-cliffhanger! Let me know what you think in a review, and if you have any ideas don't hesitate to let me know! And don't forget to favorite/follow!**

**xx Caroline**


	2. Not Yet, But Soon

**It's here! It's here! It's hereeeeeeeee!**

**This is a chapter that you'll really need to know Falling For You on, so make sure you've read that!**

**Again, many, many, MANY thanks to Beffax3, who is not only my fabulous idea-giver, but also my new Aussie friend!**

**Enjoy! xx**

* * *

It was a few weeks after Julianna's birthday, and Lauren was stirring a pot of tomato sauce for that night's spaghetti. She hummed under her breath as the sauce bubbled, feeling contentment coursing through her, as it always did when she was doing something she loved.

She checked the clock. Normally, the girls would be home from school, but they both had after-school activities today- Julianna had rehearsal for the school play and Tara had soccer practice.

Lauren frowned as the doorbell sounded. It couldn't be either of the girls. Maybe Darren came home early? Yes- that was it. He was home early, and he had forgotten his keys. She set the spoon down on the side of the stove and quickly rinsed her hands off before walking into the entryway.

She smiled as she opened the door, but her smile quickly faded as she realized who was standing on the other side of the door.

Mark gave her his signature devilish grin. "Lauren, baby! How are you?"

* * *

_Lauren was suddenly standing in an alleyway. Her hands were bound and she was gagged, in horrible pain. She was screaming, but no one could hear her. She was completely alone._

* * *

_Then the scene shifted. She was standing in the middle of the bathroom in the apartment she used to share with Julia. She felt so much pain as she cut up and down her arms and legs, but it didn't compare to the pain that she felt inside as she swallowed a handful of white pills._

* * *

_Lauren was in the hospital. Her entire body ached, and she felt her heart sink as the doctor told her that she was pregnant. Darren was mad at her, and she hated the world, and Mark, but mostly herself. Why couldn't she have succeeded in killing herself?_

* * *

Lauren snapped back to the present. "Get the fuck out of my house."

"What, not happy to see me?" Mark waggled his eyebrows. "It's been fifteen years!"

Lauren scanned the street nervously, hoping the girls weren't on their way home. The last thing she needed to do was explain to Julianna about the man standing on their doorstep.

Lauren gave Mark a hard look. "What are you doing here? Last time I saw you, the cops were hauling your sorry ass off to jail."

"My sentence is up," Mark stretched luxuriously. "Fifteen years in prison. No parole."

Lauren flashed back to another scene.

* * *

_They were in the examiners office- Lauren, Julianna, and Darren. Lauren held Julianna, trying to prize open her mouth for the doctor to do a cheek swab. When the swab was over, Lauren hugged Julianna to her body. She didn't want her daughter to be exposed to this cold, criminal world yet._

* * *

_Ten days later, Lauren's phone rang. She answered it. "Mhmm. All right. Thank you for calling." Mark had been confirmed as Julianna's biological father._

* * *

_They were back in court this time. Lauren stood in front of the judge as she was forced to recount every thing that had happened on that horrible night. Mark stood behind her. Even without looking at him, she could tell that he was smirking. She shuddered._

* * *

_The bang of the gavel sounded sharply around the courtroom. Lauren jumped. She held her breath, crossed her fingers.. "I hereby proclaim the defendant guilty." Mark held out his hands to be cuffed, but even as the officer led him away, he gave Lauren a smile and wink that made her tremble._

* * *

Lauren shook her head to clear it. These little flashbacks had started a few months after Julianna was born, but as the years had progressed, they had become less and less frequent. She hadn't had one in almost a year, but already the reappearance of Mark was having a severe impact on her.

"Mark, I'm not going to ask you twice," Lauren tried to sound tough, but her voice shook. "Get out of my house or I'll call the police."

Mark took a step back. "I'll leave.. For now. This isn't over."

Lauren slammed the door as hard as she could and sank to the floor, pulling her knees to her chest. She began sobbing. Why did this have to happen to her? She had made it through being raped. She had conquered that situation. She had two beautiful daughters and a loving husband. She had risen out of the wreckage of her relationship with Mark, and she was truly happy now. Why couldn't he just leave them alone?

She fished her phone out of her back pocket and dialed the only person who would understand.

"Lauren!" Julia sounded so cheerful. "How are you?"

Lauren sniffled. "I-I'm.." She began full-out sobbing again, clutching the phone to her ear.

"Lo?" Now Julia just sounded concerned. "Sweetie, tell me what's wrong. Is it Darren? One of the girls?"

"No.." Lauren managed to control herself. "It's Mark."

Julia felt like a bucket of ice water had hit her. "Mark?" She hadn't heard his name in years.

"Yeah," Lauren whispered. "He.. He came to my house. And I had another.. You know."

"Another flashback?" Julia asked. She had been there when the first one happened. Lauren's eyes got glassy and she stared into the distance with a blank look on her face. It had only lasted for about twenty seconds, but it was terrifying.

"Yes," Lauren sniffled. "And he said that it wasn't over. Julia, I'm scared." She couldn't help feeling like a whiny little girl again.

"Lo, it's okay to be scared," Julia said, as if she had read her best friend's mind. "After what he did to you..."

"Julia, I'm 41 years old," Lauren argued. "This is something that happened when I was 26. Why am I not over it yet?"

"Lo, sweetie, this is something you'll have to handle your entire life," Julia said, not unkindly. "Don't feel like anyone's rushing you to recover. Take all the time you need."

Lauren took a shaky breath- just talking to Julia was calming her down. "Okay. Thanks, Juls."

Julia had one more piece of advice. "And don't be afraid to call the police if it happens again, okay? I love you and I don't want anything to happen to you."

Lauren took another deep breath. "Thank you so much."

"Anything for you, Lo."

* * *

Julianna pushed open the door of the Starbucks and left the warm, coffee-scented building. She was holding her favorite, an iced coffee, courtesy of the gift card Jaime had given her on her birthday. She took a long sip of the drink, savoring it, before beginning the short walk back home. As she walked, she noticed a black car parked by the curb. Not thinking anything of it, she continued walking.

* * *

Mark glanced down at the ripped magazine page in his hands. _**INTERNATIONAL SUPERSTAR DARREN CRISS AND TEAM STARKID ACTRESS LAUREN LOPEZ CELEBRATE THE 15TH BIRTHDAY OF DAUGHTER JULIANNA**_, the headline read. Mark looked at the grainy picture of the family, comparing the face of Julianna in the picture with the face of the girl walking down the sidewalk across the street.

He smiled evilly. _Not yet,_ he thought, taking a sip of his own coffee. _Not yet, but soon._

* * *

**Ooooh! Mysterious! Drop me a review to let me know what you think, and don't forget to favorite/follow!**

**Hugs!**

**xx Caroline**


	3. Out To Dinner

**Hello my darlings! I finally got around to updating (yay!) This chapter ended a lot differently than I thought it would but I hope you enjoy anyway. Many thanks as always to my super friend Beth (BeththeBiscuit)**

**Hugs!**

* * *

The second Darren got home, Lauren grabbed his arm and dragged him into the kitchen. She pulled him into the furthest corner of the room, out of earshot of both of the girls, who were watching TV on the sofa in the living room.

Darren was completely taken aback. "Lauren? What's wrong?"

Lauren's face was incredibly serious. "Darren.." She took a shaky breath, trying to stay calm.

"Lo? Just tell me. Whatever it is, we'll work through it together." Darren wrapped his arms around her in a big hug. "We can handle this, whatever it is."

Lauren pressed her face into his chest. "Darren, Mark came here today."

Whatever Darren had been expecting, it haden't been that. He took a step back, his face almost draining of all color.

"Darren, please don't freak out," Lauren begged. She could already feel tears starting to form in her eyes.

"What happened?" Darren asked in a croaky voice.

Lauren sucked in a deep breath. "He just showed up. I think.. I think he was trying to intimidate me. And he said that it wasn't over." A lone tear trickled down her cheek. "And.. I had more flashbacks."

Darren tried to clear his head. What was most important right now was making sure that Lauren was mentally and emotionally fine. So he reached out and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her small body against his. "It'll be all right," he whispered into her hair. "I promise. Nothing will ever, EVER hurt you or the girls while I'm here. I love you, Lo."

Lauren relaxed into Darren's warm embrace. They stood there for a long time before Lauren finally looked up. Her eyes were sparkling with tears. "Do you really think everything will be okay, Darren? Really?"

Darren gave her a sqeeeze. "I know it will. You know I'd do anything for you."

Lauren leaned up to kiss him. "I love you so much, Darren."

* * *

"Lo? You almost ready?" Darren called up the staircase as he pulled on his shoes. "Traffic is hell this time of day."

"DARREN! Language, please!" Lauren replied, as Tara and Julianna giggled. "Give me five minutes."

She appeared in three, striking a pose at the top of the stairs as if she were in a Disney movie. She wore a green chiffon Grecian dress that fell to just above her knees, showing off her toned legs and silver flats. A silver necklace topped off the outfit.

Darren was speechless. "God, Lo," he managed to say at last, "you look absolutely stunning."

Lauren blushed and ducked her head. Julianna came up behind her, adjusting her necklace. "You really do look gorgeous, Mom," she said.

Lauren turned to give a hug to her daughter. "Be safe tonight, okay? Jaime will be here in an hour. You can manage until then, right?"

"We'll be fine," Julianna insisted. "I still don't understand why Jaime needs to come over. We've stayed home alone plenty of times."

Lauren bit her lip. "I just thought it might be more fun for you girls to have Jaime here. And she misses you guys, she hardly ever gets to see you."

Julianna smiled at her mother's overprotectiveness. "All right, if it makes you feel better."

"That's my girl," Lauren said as she gave Julianna a final hug before heading into the bedroom to do the same to Tara. "I love you both!" she called as Darren opened the front door.

* * *

She glanced back at the house nervously as Darren began to drive away. "Are you sure they'll be fine?" she asked for what seemed like the millionth time. "Maybe we shouldn't go." She hugged her thin arms to her body.

"Lo," Darren said reassuringly, "They'll be fine. You haven't been out of the house for almost a month, and I'm taking you to dinner. You can't let yourself completely shut the world out."

Lauren sighed. "I know. It's just.. I worry, you know?"

Darren glanced over at his beautiful wife. "They'll be fine," he repeated. "Try to enjoy tonight, Lo. You work so hard at being a mom, I think you forget that you have every right to go out and have a good time like everyone else."

"I guess I do," Lauren admitted. "I just love them. A lot. The world is so incredibly fucked up, and they shouldn't have to experience that."

Darren was quiet for a long time. "No, they shouldn't have to. No one should have to. But they do, and there's not much we can do to stop it." He pulled into a parking space in front of the restaurant. "It'll be okay. I promise. Our girls are tough, and they can make it through anything."

"I hope you're right," Lauren murmured.

* * *

They both felt a little melancholy as they left the car, but that mood quickly vanished as they stepped into the restaurant. A live band was playing and Darren, like a true musician, immediately picked up on the beat and began tapping his foot. Suddenly, he reached for Lauren's hand and twirled her right there in the middle of the room. Even this little thing made them both ridiculously happy.

The waitress smiled at them as she led them to the table. "You two enjoy," she said kindly as she handed them the menus.

Lauren squeezed Darren's hand across the table. "I can't remember the last time we had dinner together alone," she marveled.

"Probably before Julianna was born," Darren chuckled. There was a pause in the conversation as they ordered drinks.

"So.." Darren began after the waitress had left. "Tomorrow is a very important day."

Lauren's forehead wrinkled in confusion. "It is?" She rapidly calculated in her head, but nothing stood out to her.

Darren took a sip of his water. "Yup," he proclaimed. "It marks fifteen years since May 24th, 2012."

Lauren searched her brain again, even more desperately. "Darren, I'm sorry... I can't for the life of me remember what happened on that day."

Darren grinned at her, completely understanding. "Because it may not be a huge day for you. But it was a day that changed me forever." He rubbed his thumb across the top of her hand. "It was the day I took you to Golden Gate Park. And we kissed and it felt so.. so right. Even then, when we were young and stupid, something special was happening."

Lauren had to blink back tears as she thought of that day. She had been alone, depressed, broken. And Darren had come along and saved her from herself. He had saved her from Mark, too. That was the day that so much had changed.

"I remember that," Lauren smiled. Darren began to smile back, but his smile became frozen as he stared at a point behind Lauren's shoulder. "Darren?" she asked worriedly, as she turned to check.

"Mark." Darren's voice came out as a growl. He made to stand up.

"Darren, sit down!" Lauren begged.

"No!" Darren tried to pull away. "I'm going over there and beating the hell out of him."

"Darren, you're not going to beat him up," Lauren hissed, tightening her grip on his hand. "You're 41. You know what'll happen if you beat him up? You'll get arrested. You can't fucking start a fight in public, Darren."

Darren gave a loud sigh, but resigned himself to the fact that she was right. "Fine. I won't throw any punches. I just want to have a few words with him."

He stalked over to Mark's table, where he was sitting with a girl who looked to be in her mid twenties. Her head jerked up, terrified, as Darren approached.

"Listen the fuck up, Mark, because I'm keeping this short and sweet," Darren snarled under his breath. "Stay the fuck away from my family, or I will not hesitate to beat the hell out of you. Are we clear?" Not giving Mark time to answer, he marched back to Lauren.

She was almost in tears, and her hands were shaking so badly she couldn't hold her water glass. "Sweetheart, it's all right," Darren said soothingly. "We can go now." He wrapped his arm around her waist. "It's all right." He shot a dirty look at Mark, who was staring straight at them. "It's all right," he repeated.

The car ride home was completely silent.

* * *

**I like reviews. You should review.**

**xx Caroline**


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